It's been said that as parents, it is our job to work ourselves out of a job. Or to see our children to that place of adulthood where our job description is significantly and irreversibly altered. We do that by shining our parenting light into our adult world (as an example) and into our children's world (as a nurturer). I want to encourage you to continue to shine in the humble servant’s position that is parenthood. It is a job in which you may not get a lot of accolades, but shine anyway.   Two years ago, I began writing for Patch. Though I had hundreds of publication credits to my name, …

This Christmas season has been unique for me. Though I’m not one to get caught up in the shopping frenzy, preferring instead the charm of homespun gifts and simple conveyances (like giving a goat!), this year, more than ever, I’ve stayed out of the stores. I did take a young friend shopping (she helped me choose for my kids; I helped her choose for her mom) and it was a night filled with the wonder of the giving-spirit of Christmas. An experience everyone should have. There is nothing wrong with having fun shopping. Yet as I shop, I’m almost always aware that if I spend too lavishly I will …

“Trinity” had been receiving unwelcomed “sext” messages.   Her story has been difficult for me to write; I felt the “telling” carried an incredible weight. Certain details — the specific words that were said to her and the fact that she had experimented with cutting as a result, weighed on me. I didn’t know what to tell, what to leave out. I wondered: did I save Trinity’s story as the last in this series for a purpose, or did I somehow put it off, because it was difficult to deal with? I now see that the best way to cap off this series about Kids (and Adults) and Social Media is to hear from …

“For a good time, call: 867-5309…” My name’s not “Jenny,” but I do know that back in the day, no respectable girl wanted her number on the bathroom stall. Today, the “stall” comes with its own keypad. God help the girl whose number gets "posted." You might as well put it in a song, for anyone to call, for all eternity. If you came of age in the eighties, you’re laughing with me. Sort of. But your stomach hurts, because now it’s our kids we are talking about. The song is theirs, and they-- God forbid—could be the victims of these “posts.” This final story of the “social media” series—it is the…

This week, I listened as some young teachers reflected on some of the names they’ve been called lately. Though their conversation was lighthearted, I know from experience that no matter how many times we shake the dust from our sandals and walk on, we still limp just a little from the words that have been hurled our way.   Instantly, I remembered the words a student wrote in his journal about me some 20 years earlier, when I was a 22-year-old high school teacher: “Mrs. Noble is a skinny, flat-chested b****…” Though I didn’t share that specific memory in the staff lunchroom, I did say to my …

The Conversation U up? Yep. <3 Texting ALAP. TYVM. :) HUD? Good. HBU? M$UlkeCraZ. Want 121, F2F. Not 2nite 4sure. L?^L8R? 2moro? COBRAS? Lol. Not sure. LHOS. Now. IYD! Yep. DISTO? JK. Sort of. FOGC? RMMA.   BTWITIAILWY. ? CUWTA. LOL. Looked it up. Aww…that’s sweet. ;) Still, IDK… AUNT—u can trust me. TBH, B4U I never would've…but 1432. It will b ok. FTFOI? I will delete right after. KPC. WDYT? WRU? IDK…In my room… J Send me a Pic? Plz? GNOC? GOI. UR cra-cra. GNSD. No. Let’s GOWI. IPN. Sending u a pic now. NVNG…SHMILY?   The Grade Patch Parents, if this were a test, would you make the grade? …

I always say that when God wants to drive home a point, He makes sure I hear it from several sources. This happens to me so routinely, I have to wonder if God knows I'm just so dense that I won’t learn it any other way ... This week, while serving as a greeter at a theater audition, I listened as a friend sang “Count Your Blessings.” Later, she told me that she was singing it for me. “How sweet,” I thought, but I really didn’t get it, yet. Two days later, someone else commented: even when it’s difficult, we need to “count our blessings." As I was “recounting” the conversations to yet another …

Your heart pounds. Your hands tremble. You hide in the basement where there is more privacy, even though you suspect your mom is listening down the clothes-chute. Your mind is racing with what you need to say to get to the object of your crush. How can you even think about how you’ll word the invitation? You pick up the receiver, place it behind your ear, then dial. It seems an eternity until each number rotates back to its spot, making way for the next turn. All the while, your head is spinning with words. “Hello?” All your perfectly articulated words have turned to mush. “Uh, helllloo? Is-…

Parents who go through a divorce begin to feel “empty nest” feelings in a season that feels as though it is too soon. Adjustments are difficult for both parents and kids.  This week, I interviewed four parents who have experienced divorce. These men and women, whose stories I am sharing under pseudonyms, have faced getting used to living without their children, at least part of the time, and survived, even when they felt as if they might not be able to. If you are going through a divorce that includes the adjustment of shared parenting or partial custody, I hope that the stories shared here …

One of the things I love about this column is that I get to hear and disseminate and retell real-life stories. It is one of the highest honors of what I do, because each story is a treasure. Each person is precious. There is purpose in every experience. Telling a story allows others to partake, to be a part of someone’s life experience, to gain wisdom and to feel compassion for what a person has gone through. Being part of the story reminds us of our own humanity. Part of my “training ground” for “hearing” and “telling” came from years of meeting people and  listening to them — asking …

Last week, I had the opportunity to share the story of a couple who had planned carefully for the day when their nest would be “empty.” I hope that Will and Kim Adamczyk’s story will inspire younger Patch families to plan for and anticipate new stages life has to offer. I also recognize that many of our readers have family situations that distract or preclude them from such planning. To round out this series, I felt I needed several perspectives, and I wanted to interview a “Single-Parent Empty Nester” to share his/her story. When my initial lead fell through, I did what any objective …

They’ve paid their dues as PTO parents and as Coach and Kool-Aid Mom, and now, the “end of the dock” has come and gone. Over the past several years, the birds of their flock have flown (right off the end of the dock — or was it their diving board?), but this couple is not the type to stand on the last plank and ponder sinking or swimming. Instead, they, too, intend to fly.   Besides, there are days when the Adamczyk nest doesn’t feel exactly empty. When I stopped by, feathers were flying everywhere, as 24-year-old-daughter Erica chatted in the kitchen with some long-missed girlfriends, her …

I am the youngest of four girls. My sisters are five, seven and nine years older than I. I was the Baby. The after-thought. The surprise (though my mother insists that all of her children were “PLANNED.") (I’ve always wanted to ask her if this implies that “oopses” are somehow less-loved…) I was definitely the Last Hope for a Boy. (I am Donna Jeanne, named after my father, Donald Eugene.) Once, with a group of moms who were talking about how life changed after the addition of the third child in the family, my mother commented: “I don’t know, for me it was the fourth that pushed me over the …

As a summer person, I remind myself that my season doesn’t actually come to an end until the sun crosses the celestial equator moving southward, a day known as the Autumnal Equinox. And Dear Patch Friends, it's not here yet! This year, that day is on Sept. 22. By my count, that give us 32 more days of summer! This is good news for parents like me who traditionally miss their kids when school starts, and still long for summer family fun. Play those 32 days for all they’re worth! Take a hike, go for a boat ride, stop and get some ice cream! It's not too late! Sure, there are team practices, …

Alivia Zimmerman is destined to know and love fish and water. These things run deep in her bloodline, for generations. At age 2, Alivia has already caught her first fish and experienced countless kayak outings. She also visited the Greater Cleveland Aquarium, with which she has family connections.   These are planks on the dock most kids haven’t set foot on, but there’s something fishy about Alivia’s family. In fact, there’s a lot that’s fishy about the Zimmerman clan. Alivia’s dad, Brian Zimmerman (a Stark County native) has been fishing since he was younger than Alivia is now. From early …

When my kids were little, we often purchased a zoo pass. It was a good investment, as we could visit several parks, year-round, for not much more than it cost for a family of four for one summer day’s visit.  Though we have many wonderful zoological parks in Ohio, the Akron Zoo was always my favorite for young children. Just far enough away to be an “excursion,” yet close enough that we didn’t waste a lot of time getting there, we could easily see all the animals in a morning or afternoon (or the whole day if we wanted) without coming home in complete exhaustion. Now that the kids are older, …

Having been Rylee and Maisyn’s music teacher … since … um … birth, I was thrilled when their mom, Amber Whitt, replied to my Patch/Facebook query: “Does anyone want to have some summer fun together?” with a “Pick me!” We settled on an adventure that was nearby and free.  My teenage son happens to be the world’s most fabulous 15-year-old and fantastically loved by young children, so we invited him along. The Interactive Water Fountain is located on 2nd Street in Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, near the Clock Tower, so it took us less than 1/2 hour to get there. Our directions said to park at the “Blue” …

When our children were young, I had the incredible blessing of spending every day of summer with them. Even during the school year, I had the best of both worlds, working just two days a week. There was certainly sacrifice involved in that economic decision, and it put us on a tight entertainment budget, but I’ll never regret that choice. Those days provided some of our most treasured memories.   The simplest of pleasures were favorites: snuggling on the porch swing with stacks of books, a blanket and a guitar under a shade tree, chasing each other up and down the slide, or playing “ice-cream…

When Pam Washburne’s husband passed away unexpectedly, one of the first women to reach out to her was Carly Engrish-Desphy. Carly’s presence was especially meaningful because she understood, beyond the shadow of any doubt, what Pam was going through. Carly had lost her husband 2 and half years earlier and had discovered her own need to be among people who understood. Carly spoke with Pam, listened to her, and brought books she herself had found helpful. “When you’re grieving, you don’t have the time or desire to get on Amazon and start searching. All you can think about is how sad you are,” …

It was Father’s Day, and for some members of Heartache to Healing in Canton, it was their first Father’s Day without a spouse to help them celebrate. Running the race was a way to be proactive about what could be a difficult day, with others who would be experiencing similar emotions.  Carly Engrish-Desphy, co-founder of Heartache to Healing, Canton, and the coach/organizer of the eleven member team, said that when she heard that the event was going to be on Father’s Day, she considered it a “sign from God” that she should form a group to participate. Though Carly herself is a runner and past…